Gray Skies

Spring is the most fickle of all the seasons. We just had four beautiful days of sunshine and 65 degree temperatures. And now, as I sit down to write, I’m staring at grey skies, next to my winter coat because it’s barely above freezing. Maybe it has something to do with the anticipation and expectations of what is to come. As though one sunny day tricks us- at least me- into believing that they’ll all be sunny days from here on out. And even as I type that, I realize how unrealistic it is.

I always push myself to take advantage of sunny days— go outside, plant something, ride your bike, cook dinner on the grill— truly anything outside to soak up the sunshine. But what if I thought about gray days the same way?

What’s good about a cold, gray day? After the end of a long, endlessly gray winter, it is hard to come up with anything. And yet, here I am tucked into a cozy corner at a coffee shop with a hot cup of tea, reading and writing for fun. These are some of my favorite things about life.

I can look out the window and still see new growth all around. Buds are still on the trees and bulbs are still poking up through the ground. Birds are still singing. The gray skies haven’t, and cannot, erased the growth.

I feel a bit like a one of the disciples in the boat with Jesus, before he calmed the storm. As I look out the window at these endless gray skies, I think of the disciples in the boat that night, watching Jesus sleep as the boat filled with water.

“Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” They cried out to him and he woke up. It’s as if one more gray day or, God forbid, an April snowstorm is going to push me over the edge and I’m just going to get in my car and drive till I see the sun.

Jesus never left them, even when all the disciples could see was the storm; Jesus is a constant presence in our lives. Just like the consistency of the seasons, spring is coming, regardless of what the weather may bring us on any given morning. The gray sky reminds me that growth is not linear, that even in dark seasons, when everything is covered in snow. Growth comes slowly and then all at once, when we look into the mirror and realize we’re not the same as we were this time last year. There are small comforts to appreciate, to trust and know that a new season will break, even in the inevitable April snow storm.